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Do Lobsters Feel Pain?

It seems I must have a thing about lobsters, because I keep writing about them. But, the fact that we cook this one (and only one) creature alive really bothers me. So, the inspiration for this slightly humorous fantasy poem about the practice, and why I have a problem with it.
©2014 by Jon Gutmacher
How do you know
lobsters feel no pain
when you throw them in
the pot?
You say to me their brain’s too small
. . . and that’s all that
they’ve got

But to tell you the truth
I’m not all that sure
and there’s no way to certainly tell
so I’ve decided that
no matter what . . .
I’m not putting them in
Lobster Hell

That’s not to say they aren’t real good
with butter on the side
but one thing for sure
if it’s up to me
I’m not cooking them

And microwave?
Boy, that’s sure sick!
as they’re knocking on the glass
I think they’re saying
“This really sucks!”
I’m sure
I’d rather

And so I order al la carte
and tell the maitre d’
that while I want some Lobster Thermidor
this is how it’s gotta be:

The lobsters shall not be boiled alive
. . . or in a microwave end
and while I’ll still be eating them
and I doubt
I’ll be their friend

But, at least my conscience
will be crystal clear
for everyone to see
that they met a better end
at least – on my plate
That’s the way
it’s got to be.

The background photo origin is unknown.
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